Not me, you say? It may not be apparent at first, but your alter ego, “bridezilla”, will rear her ugly head more than once. There are numerous things a bride is expected to do in preparation for the big day (have you ever seen a wedding checklist? Yikes!). And there will inevitably be a never-ending list of curve balls that will be thrown, not to mention we are now a generation of women who hold down jobs and have children while attempting to juggle being full-time wedding planners.
As a Relational Therapist, I often see couples before, during and after the engagement. One notable difference between the women whose relationships last and the ones that don’t are how they respond to the many stressful situations that are thrown their way during the critical months of planning the perfect wedding.
Here are some tips to help get you through:
1. Set Boundaries With Your Family And Your Future In-Laws
- Everyone is bound to be excited about the wedding and have big ideas and plans expected to be incorporated into your big day. But this can often cause drama between the families. It will be your job to make clear your expectations for their involvement.
2. Don’t Let “Bridezilla” Get The Best Of You
- Accidentally freak out about something and regret it? It’s never too late to apologize. A sincere “I’m sorry” can work wonders.
3. Keep Your Groom Involved
- Making big decisions together will help you grow closer as a couple and will get him more excited about the wedding. After all, he was responsible for setting the wheels in motion in the first place.
4. Ask For Help When You Need It
- Working, raising children and planning a wedding at the same time is an impossible task. If there is any undertaking you can delegate to a willing party, do it! It will alleviate unnecessary stress from your life (and your relationship), and allow you to focus on what you believe is most important.
5. Have Fun!
- Don’t forget the end goal – your marriage! Your wedding will be special for that reason alone. Ultimately, a wedding is just one day, and will be over before you know it. It is a small fraction of the time you will spend with each other in your life together. And I promise, the color of your napkins, though it seems pivotal at the moment, will not matter on the day you and your future husband exchange “I do’s” and embark on your journey as husband and wife.
This topic of the week is brought to you by Danielle Adinolfi, MFT