Philadelphia MFT - Psychotherapy for the modern world
Follow Philadelphia MFT on Social Media
  • Home
  • Therapists
    • Danielle Massi, LMFT
    • Brian Swope, LMFT
    • Alanna Gardner, MFT
    • Malyka Cardwell, MFT
  • Services
    • Premarital Bootcamp
    • Types of Therapy >
      • Sex Therapy
      • Couple's & Systemic Therapy
    • Shop MedAmour
  • The Blog
  • Multimedia
  • Contact

Philadelphia MFT

... A New Perspective on You and Your Relationships

Schedule an Appointment

​Speaking in Two Different Languages: why men and women don’t understand each other

2/8/2017

1 Comment

 
Picture
So often in couples therapy, I hear my clients complain that the other person doesn’t understand them. “He hears me ask him to do the same thing ten times, and then claims I never said it!” “She talks constantly about what she’s feeling and I can’t get a minute to breath!” Sound familiar? This dynamic is all too familiar for most couples, and does not seem to get better over time. In fact, the majority of my work as a couples therapist surrounds the topic of communication. My job as therapist becomes that of a translator, hearing and interpreting what each person says for their partner.
 
So, why are we so different? It seems that the answer to this question lies in both nature and nurture.
 
Our genetic differences set us on different paths before birth, with men having difficulty with attention, whereas women are able to efficiently multitask. Men are also born with less verbal fluency and emotional understanding then women. This is compounded over time when boys are socialized to be tough and girls learn to empathize with others. This stark difference in how we understand and experience emotions puts us on different playing fields, and this difference is quite obvious in relationships.
 
As adults, women feel their emotions on a multitude of levels; first acknowledging its presence, second trying to understand where it comes from, and third communicating it. Men typically don’t share this ability, instead having difficulty with their emotions, and burying them below the surface due to a lack of understanding.
 
In order to get start speaking the same language, women can try two this two-step technique that will help them communicate (i.e. speak menglish) with their partner. Start by remembering that men have a limited focus, and wait until you have their complete attention to speak. Next, give your partner some time to think about how he wants to answer you. Emotions are complex, and working through them can take time, especially for someone who is not as well-versed or high in emotional IQ.


This blog post was written by Danielle Adinolfi, MFT
1 Comment
http://college-papers.org/ link
4/16/2017 02:21:06 pm

Thanks for making such a cool project. I've been checking the site for the Windows version, but I never left a comment about it. I know you are working hard and doing it for free so you shouldn't feel rushed or anything. I hope you can continue this type of hard work to this site in future also. Because this blog is really very informative and it helps me lot.

Reply



Leave a Reply.

    Archives

    November 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    January 2018
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    October 2014
    September 2014
    August 2014
    July 2014
    June 2014
    May 2014
    April 2014
    March 2014
    February 2014
    January 2014
    December 2013
    November 2013
    October 2013
    September 2013
    August 2013
    July 2013
    June 2013
    May 2013
    April 2013
    March 2013
    February 2013
    January 2013
    December 2012
    November 2012
    October 2012
    September 2012
    August 2012
    July 2012
    June 2012
    May 2012

    Categories

    All
    Addiction
    Anxiety
    Bullying
    Chronic Illness
    Communication
    Disease
    Disorders
    Divorce
    Family
    Friendships
    Grief
    Heart Disease
    Relationships
    Work Related Stress

    RSS Feed

Schedule your appointment today!


Hours

M-S: 9am - 9pm

Telephone

215-995-0176

Email

contact@philadelphiamft.com
Photos used under Creative Commons from Tavallai, Free Grunge Textures - www.freestock.ca, Ronald (Ron) Douglas Frazier, forum.linvoyage.com, steffy., Jonathan Rolande, Mohammed Jaffar, Arun kumar | Photography, nparekhcards, CarbonNYC [in SF!], Bookis, Arya Ziai, sheggy, Free for Commercial Use, Ted Drake, hyacinth50, Emery Co Photo, scatto felino, OUCHcharley, Simon & His Camera, aqsahu, ChristophLacroix, LadyV25, Keoni Cabral, Rosmarie Voegtli, Skley, jk+too, apparena, laradanielle, miguelb, Emery Co Photo, geishaboy500, Momentchensammler, elidr, mypubliclands, PinkPersimon, _-0-_, LOLren, spinster cardigan, westconn, katerha, Mitya Kuznetsov, Daquella manera, Spirit-Fire, haven't the slightest, RowdyKittens, Kathleen Waters Photography, Jangra Works, 準建築人手札網站 Forgemind ArchiMedia, Cristiano Betta, derrickcollins, Wanna Be Creative, Lodderup, .FuturePresent., urbaneapts, woodleywonderworks, sara biljana (account closed), C. K. Hartman, timo_w2s, William Hook, Courtney Emery, LaVladina, mynameisharsha, SHOTbySUSAN, Crystl, Pink Sherbet Photography, Thuy Pham, CJS*64 A man with a camera, braerik, Kirt Edblom, BaileyRaeWeaver, K Tao, Matt McGee, Alex Mueller's Daily Photo, LeonArts.at, seyed mostafa zamani, AJC ajcann.wordpress.com, Sean MacEntee, ChrisHaysPhotography, theglobalpanorama, charlie 13N, mindfreeze86, Bill Kasman