What do you need to take root and grow as spring draws ever closer?
Having a goal is good, but having a plan is better. This as the ground as your plan; it’s what the supports the goal. Maybe it is to try something new, or get back into dating. Maybe it means breaking up because your relationship isn’t letting you grow. Regardless of the goal – for change within or outside of yourself, knowing what it will take to accomplish this will mean truly understanding it and yourself in the process. It may not be easy, but do no equate that with impossible. Build up the expectations that most match the reality of yourself and let this inform the steps along the way.
Let the goal be the sun and warmth, something to attract you to it, basking in your accomplishments along the way. Even before the seed flowers, there is sun and warmth to coax the next step along the way. Honor yourself.
Whatever and whomever it might be, let your supports be the water that feeds your plan. Who can you lean on in tough times; with whom can you align your plan to keep each other accountable? The people you surround yourself with should be cheering you on, either loudly or quietly, rather than blocking or tearing you down.
You will stumble at some points, but rather than a reason to call it quits, let it be something to learn from. Adjust your expectations, your plan or your supports. There is always a right time; too early or too late doesn’t make it impossible, it just means a different path to the end goal.
From the flower comes seeds, seeds of learning and growth for yourself on your next journey.
This process happens without a therapist, but if you find supports, or understanding yourself to be difficult, time spent with a therapist can mean exploring your options and yourself in a safe environment. A space where you can be free to think out loud, and consider the most silly to the most serious goals and plans.
The therapists at PhiladephiaMFT are client-focused; we are here to help you develop the skills you have and to build new ones as necessary toward your purpose.
This Topic of the Week was written by Brian Swope, MFT.